Dealing With The Stress of Planning a Wedding
Your wedding day and the months prior, are a time you want to remember
fondly, not recall as a stressful, chaotic period. Impossible you may
say, but it can be done by remembering a few simple things
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Be organised
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Plan ahead
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Delegate
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Communicate
The best place to start your wedding planning is by talking to friends
and family about their wedding experiences. This way you'll pick up great
ideas - and also learn from their mistakes. Then get reading, surround
yourself with wedding magazines, and wedding websites.
It's important for you and your fiance to sit down together, early in
the process to figure out exactly what you want. Prioritise and communicate.
Decide what is and what isn't negotiable and go from there. A couple needs
to choose their battles and be willing to give in on certain things so
they can stand firm on other issues.
Couples should also resolve to stay united and make decisions together.
Even an innocuous decision, such as telling your future in-laws you're
having a harpist at the ceremony, should be checked out with your intended.
Emotions tend to run high at this time, so a couple should vow to be accountable
only to each other and thus minimise possible tension.
Setting a budget together, and sticking to it, will reduce your stress
level. Once you've established how much money you have to spend start
looking at venues, photographers, DJs, wedding gowns etc.
If figures aren't your forte, ask for help from friends or family, but
beware, everyone has an opinion. Some people can get down right pushy
or have different expectations from your own. Conflict, and stress will
arise if too many people try to run the show or take the leadership role.
Suggestions are fine, but you and your fiance should stay in charge. Compromise
if necessary. If parents are helping financially but you still want to
have the final say, you need to make this clear early on. Just be sure
everyone knows where they stand.
It also pays to call around early and get quotes before making bookings
so you can juggle your budget if necessary. The last thing you need is
to be stressing about how you’re going to pay for everything. Remember
to keep a record of spending as you go, being careful not to overstep
your budget. Don’t forget to delegate tasks whenever possible. Don’t
try to do it all yourself or you'll end up truly stressed. Although brides
often play a larger role in wedding planning, grooms are capable of taking
on their fair share.
If possible look for a venue that does most of the work for you - catering,
flowers, music, cake, and ceremony venue all rolled into one. That takes
a huge chunk out of your organising schedule.
Another option, if you can afford it, is to employ professionals to organise
the entire wedding leaving only minimal tasks for you, which leaves plenty
of time to add those personal touches. Paying someone else to do the stressing
is a great idea!
Be true to your wedding checklist, to keep stress at bay. Once you've
set your wedding date, make a checklist of what you need to do and work
through it. Remember you run the list, the list doesn't run you! Use a
three-ring binder, accordion file or some other means of keeping all your
wedding information together. This requires some organisation but it pays
off in the long run. If you've never used a daily calendar before, this
is a great time to start.
Finally, there's a good reason people often start planning their nuptials
a year in advance. Having more time to work out the details, means less
stress. Consider your wedding date carefully.
If stress does become an issue, here's some suggestions
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Allow thirty minutes for a long walk, every other day
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Reduce your caffeine intake and switch to water
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Take a "time-out" day for something fun
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Dim the lights and enjoy a long, hot bath--together
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Make an appointment for a massage
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